Monday, March 05, 2007
Monday, March 05, 2007 ●

everything is juz not in my way todae!!!!!!!! everything is lyk against me todae!!!! i juz spent a lot if time n effort trying to complete my chi online discussion!!!!! I REALLI PUT IN A LOT FO EFFORT N HARD WORK IN DOING THE WORK!!!!!! BUT ALL I GET IS FAILURE AND FAILURE N FAILURE!!!!!!!!!!! I NOE GOD IS HELPING ME. BU SEEING Y HARD WORK GO DOWN THE DRAIN IS JUZ SOOOO SADENING!!!!!!!! OMG N IT'S NOT THE FRIST TIME.... I AHTE THIS I HATE THIS I HATE THIS!!!!!!!! IT'S LYK SHE'S NOT EVEN GIVING ME ANY CHANCE LAR!!!! I FEEL SOOO TIRED LE.....IT'S LYK NO MATTER HOW HARD I WORK AND TRY.... ALL I RECEIVE IS THE SIGHT OF ALL MY HARD WORK GOING DOWN INTO THE DRAIN. I REALLI HATE THIS!!!! I M WILLING TO GIF MYSELF ANOTHER CHANCE... BUT I M TIRED OF ALL THIS.... WHY IS IT TT EVERYTHING IS AGAINST ME NOW.... ISSIT TT GOD WANT ME TO GROW STRONGER IN TIMES OF DIFFICULTY?OR IS IT FER ME TO REALISE ALL THOSE THINGS TT I NV REALLI NOTICE ALL THIS WHILE? FINE.... I NOE TT I HUV A CARING N LOVING FAMILY.... BUT NO MATTER HOW MUCH ENCOURAGEMENT U ALL GAVE ME... IT JUZ SEEMS SOOO BLUR N DISTANCE TO ME... BUT ALL THESE DARKNESS IN MY HEART.... U CANNOT UNDERSTAND!!! UNLESS U HUV BEEN THRU IT SOOOO MANI TIMES LYK ME!!!! I APPRECIATE ALL THOSE ENCOURAGEMENT FROM ALL OF YOU...BUT I M SOO TIRED NOW.... I JUZ PROMISE MYSELF TO BE STRONG...TO WORK HARD FER MY CHI. BUT NOW ALL THIS IS JUZ MAKING ME TO GIVE UP ON WORKING HARD ON ANYTHING!!!
GOD, I NEED TIME FER RECOVERY...... I NEED YOU TO HEAL MY HEART!!!! I JUZ HOPE TT THE DISCUSSION BOARD WILL NOT HUV ANY ERROR AFTER I POST SUCH A LONG POST.... I DUN FEEL LYK WORKING HARD ANYMORE. WHAT IFLATER IT APPEARS TO BE ANOTHER ERROR?

xxxxxx

( Run to the city. )