Wednesday, August 24, 2005
Wednesday, August 24, 2005 ●

_____________*the terrible feeling has came back to me...

din blog fer weeks ready, coz my com spoilt... n i was sick of my tablet can??? it was wow slow manz!!! so din bother to blog using it...kkz... common test long over got back result... not ideal lar... shit manz...allll my grades deprove lyk hell lor... is lyk taking fast speed escalator slide down lor... i need immediate help...coz i self-reflect juz now, now realise tt it is not possible for me to study wen there is no one pushing me forward. i m juz sooo slack can... n my attitude n character have changed soo much lolx... tis few weeks keep get scolding by teacher at least once a week... den mon. got scolded by my conductor... yuppx...did sum self-reflection... n ok..i was in the wrong so she scolded me... hmm...said tt she notices every girl during the practise n i was lyk sooo sort of slacky during all the practises...hmm... actually wanna tell her i can't stand the cold n is lyk we stanbd fer a long time liaoz...but it is excuses rite, i m sure she won't accept excuses, n tt if i tell her tt she will sure scold me. coz i now tt if i was her, i would oso do the same wen sumone gove me excuses wen they were in da wrong...i realli feel lyk saeing sry to her... but she was angry??? so betta not... haiz... tink tt she's angry wif me...if i continue lyk tt she will ask me to quit choir lol... but m i tt slacky during da past few practises??? i ask my frenz, they sae u din realize rite...hmm... mayb i was used to my slackiness??? she is an excellent conductor kkz... even me oso feel tt lar... God...pls help me not to be so slack can...??? haiz... pls. help me lor... i m scared tt my slackiness will show out during choir prac. how??? i realli need help...hmm... jialing was standing next to me wen i was scolded..later she told me hmm... i look so bu shuang lor... she sae ndp choir n even sum choir prac. i oso got tt bu shuang de face... realli meh??? nvm... anw... txks fer telling me kkz... so i can try to smile more often... if i keep got tt bu shuang face, one dae everbodi will tink tt i veri slacky n bu shuang lor... hmm... nowadaes found it veri veri veri veri super duper hard to concentrate during lesson...mayb is coz of this den i did badly fer my common test. i realli dun feel lyk taking back my results... realli veri afraid tt i will b sad wen i look at my results...n i realli cannot stand tt feeling...dere is still final exam...oops...almoz slip my mind tt tml i huv chi./ oral!! shit how lar???good luck fer tml...how??? i dun tink i got sufficient time to revise lor... dere is soo much work to revise can??? i dun wanna get back my results my rport bk!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i can faint lor........................ haiz... gtg liaoz... bb... yingying bloggy

xxxxxx

( Run to the city. )